Now, while I generally agree with you, I am led to ask (perhaps because having written tens of philosophy papers in the last year has left me with an instinct for playing the devil's advocate), do you really think--based on your experience--that this kind of deception has a truly deleterious effect on children, or that it's just unpleasant on the same grounds that any kind of lie or prevarication is? Because while I'm fairly certain it's unpleasant for a kid to grow up and realize that they'd been misled on this kind of thing (albeit "passed away"/"passed" is so widespread a euphemism I'd question whether or not it's truly misleading--even if kids who are, say, six don't get it NOW it will probably click eventually), I'm not sure it's cruel to the degree you mention in your first comment.
I'm all for telling the truth to kids, but this has to take into account their relative mental maturity (i.e., would "died" even make sense without explanation?) and possibly emotional sensitivities. While saying "your dog ran away" is an outright lie, saying s/he "passed away" doesn't seem particularly odious to me. The second phrasing still gives the same kind of closure died would, and so far as I can tell, other than the moral weight assigned to truth-telling/lying, that's the only difference between the two--both imply the dog is gone, but one makes it clear the dog is not coming back.
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2007-02-06 02:29 am (UTC)I'm all for telling the truth to kids, but this has to take into account their relative mental maturity (i.e., would "died" even make sense without explanation?) and possibly emotional sensitivities. While saying "your dog ran away" is an outright lie, saying s/he "passed away" doesn't seem particularly odious to me. The second phrasing still gives the same kind of closure died would, and so far as I can tell, other than the moral weight assigned to truth-telling/lying, that's the only difference between the two--both imply the dog is gone, but one makes it clear the dog is not coming back.
Gah. *slaps herself* Too much philosopher-brain.